sometimes, the road sets ahead of u may seem to be only one. But if you look to the left/right, you'd find that there's another hidden road that may be a longer way but it still leads to the designated destination you want to go.
If you feel that you are injured, why not take the long road? You can choose to continue on the straight road and get yourself even more injured and whether you'd survive, no one knows. But if you take the long road, you'd reach your destination but of cos, everything has to be paid a price. The road may take a longer time, but if you can survive, why not?
Right now, I'm offering a hidden road for you. But yet u chose to look straight ahead. And your companions, unhurt/uninjured kept wanting you to the walk the straight road. Inside you, you know you can't make it anymore but yet, your companions kept rushing you. You don't feel good, do you? They are not the injured ones, lady, you are. You said this is all about you, so why are you letting others affect your choice? If your companions really care and love you, they'd be willing to walk the hidden and long path with you.
What's the hurry?
You are only in your mid 20s, both of you have the whole time in the world.
But IF you choose to walk the straight road...
I dunno if you'd survive past 5 years. Frankly speaking. Even if rocks had not killed you, u'd have already killed urself.
And if you think your companion is really going to accompany you to walk the straight road, you are wrong. oh yes, he is accompanying you.. he is TAGGING behind, making sure you make way for him to cross. To make sure you smash all the rocks before he walk pass them.
Does it make sense to you?
It's logical, isn't it?
If he INSIST on walking the straight road, ask him to smash those rocks instead of you doing it.
But is he? I doubt so. In fact, he chose to tag behind and listen to you say, "i can't stand it anymore" and he'd go, "i'm sorry, i can't do anything." And when i opened a hidden road for you, he was like.. "no.. what's the point?" That's easy for him to say, i am the one who is communicating with your family, i dun wish for you to get hurt, understand?
In case you forgot.. i walked through the road myself a few years back. I know how it feels like. Does he? Does anyone understands? Oh pls! They can say, "oh i understand how you feel." Go and die lah. Who understands better than the person who experienced it?
If you walk the hidden and long road, it not only serves as a better road.. an unhurt road.. a peaceful road.. (of cos, the only thing is that it's longer) but it also serves as a test for your companion. Would he stick with you till the end? Or would he just u-turn back and walk another road down with someone else?
This is all about you. You are the one injured. You are the one suffering. You are the one who is crying. NO ONE ELSE have the rights to decide for you. NO ONE ELSE have the rights to influence you, get it?
you are smart, but i duno why when it comes to your relationship, you are all thumbs.
Wake up.. pls.. if you dun help yourself, i can't do anything either.
If you think the longer road is hard, look ahead to the straight road, is it making things easier? Is anything getting better? is anything changing? it's been 2 years.. has anything changed? Oh yes, i forgot to mention. The straight road doesn't even guarantee that you'd reach your destination. maybe, it'd lead to somewhere else.
Now, the straight road ahead is threatening you. it is getting tougher and tougher and it is NOT going to stop getting tougher.. are you sure you still want to walk on?
I will accompany you.. but what about when i go australia? Other than spiritually with you, can i help? I'm sorry, i know better.
In this kinda situation like yours, spiritually is never enough. Dun deny. No help is ever enough unless you help yourself.
You might say, "When is this going to stop? How long must i tolerate? Why should i stop being with him becos of them?"
Did i say anything about them? let me ask you.. who is making you suffer now? Them, right?
Let me ask you...
What is trust?
I told you before.. trust isn't build overnight... it takes time. And if you know THEM well.. u would know it's going to be hard building trust with them.
And it makes it all the harder if you continues to be with him now.
Now, what you have to do is to BUILD TRUST... they have completely lost trust in you. yes, COMPLETELY.
If you continue to go out with him, it's going to turn NEGATIVE.
Do you know what they see it as?
You are holding onto a piece of bread... and telling them.. "no, i'm not holding bread. i'm not eating bread. TRUST ME."
U get the scenario now?
If you were them, would u trust?
obviously not.
you think through it again. What i've said, i've already said.
Remember. the decision still lies in you. And you are not suffering alone. Everyone else especially them is suffering with you. Been 2 years. U were not the only one tired of this, they are tired too. You are not suffering alone.. i'm suffering with you too.
And dun be mistaken. I'm not being burden with your problems.
If i am burden with your problems, perhaps, i would have already delete your house number and stop contacting you.
I'd never do that.
And you know i'm a straight-forward person. When i can't tahan, i'll say.
Just like now, i'm telling you that your companions are being SELFISH.
"And this marks THE END of the entry."
8:51 AM
8:51 AM
Living a life full of life. That's all about me that you should know.