People are never contented. We'd always think the other side of the grass are greener. We believe that we could have more. We believe things could have turned out better.. and that's apparent where the "what if" comes from. It is when we stepped into the other side of the grass, we'd then realize how fortunate we are right now.
But things just always happen the way that it's seldom we have the chance to step into the other side and therefore, our negative thoughts always lingers on for a long time. Sometimes, it just lingers so long you'd just feel that it's never going to end.
We'd always yearn for the past. Some people would allow good memories to linger in their mind. But it's unfortunate.. ppl would also allow bad memories to linger on as well. Sometimes, it just can't be helped. we'd always want to replay back the good memories.. as for the bad memories.. we'd always wish that things could have been done differently.
We'd always advise our friends.. "let the past begone and look forward to the future for it's the future that is going to make the difference." but somehow.. it's easier said than done.
Though sec sch days's memories are traumatizing.. but in fact, it's the happiest moment in my life with my friends. Thinking back, even standing outside the class for not doing my homework really serves as a good memory as well.
The days that i always slept in class during social studies.. the days that i'd always go out with Cindy after sch.. the days that i'd go makan with kaixin.. the days that i'd went out with radzimah and audrey.. those days are irreplaceable.
I've never felt so happy before and those were the days that i felt so fortunate to have such wonderful friends (minus off the parts when they betrayed me..) Though we were a childish bunch of ppl.. it was just simply fun. I didn't regret getting lotsa detention. I didn't regret getting punished. I didn't regret for being rebellious to the teachers.. i'd nt forget the attempts to run away from home. I'd not forget the days that i play punk in sch.. because without those memories, sec sch won't be fun at all, isn't it?
somehow.. i just feel that i'd been a princess in the past. Unable to wear fake silvers/gold.. can't get insulted/scolded etc becos i'm such a cry baby.. and also.. i think i've executed too many ppl that i've simply limited friends now. Lilin is in australia.. cheryl has no longer contacted me.. radzimah has her own problems to deal with.. kaixin has her own life as well.. cindy and jessia have their bunch of night friends.. doris jie jie has her own problems as well and i can't help but feel upset that i can't help her much.. as much as i wanna share the burden with her.. i just feel that i can do more.. Jie.. mei really wish to be with you... i'm sorry tt i can't help much.. but trust me.. even if all your friends leave you.. your family abandon you.. i'd be the one standing and cheering for you.
Jie, things always happen for a reason. But you should always think of things from near to far.. pls dun happy-go-lucky your relationship through okay. If you want to save ur relationship.. pls do something about it. I know my suggestion was a really lousy one because yes.. it's easier said than done. But i can't help feeling inferior that pp should do something about it. I want you to be happy and if it's pp who you think is going to be with you for the rest of your life.. pls.. do something about it. and leaving your family is not a solution at all. Dun see your family as your enemy, jie. i believe ur family is having a hard time as you do. I know you are going to say that they somehow "deserve" it but... they are going to think the same way as you do.. I want you to spend a night alone, listen to some soft music.. and think.. what you wanna accomplish at the end of the day.. and.. most importantly.. what can be done WITH pp.
If pp isn't walking down this hardship path with you, i'm going right down to meet him and hit the life out of him. (no offence but i'm serious) I dun want you to get hurt anymore, understand?
I know i'm getting awfully naggy.. but.. just can't help nagging lah!
Maybe i'm just a super emo person that i scared away all my friends. hahaha!
people.. cherish what you have in the presence and look forward to the future. Even if you see complete darkness.. someday.. someone will light the path for you... believe in it and it'd happen. Miracles do happen and.. somehow.. it's hidden so well that you didn't even know it's a miracle. you can always miss the past. But always remember.. the past can never be amended.. the past can never be changed...
it's you who is going to make an impact in your future..
Never regret what you do.. so always remember tt whatever you do, make sure you won't regret in future. and if you make a mistake..
Dun worry. people always make mistakes. But it's how you learn from the mistakes that is going to help you take the extra step forward to your future.
No matter how bad things are.. always believe that you are not alone.
Even if you are alone..
Be glad that you are alive and healthy. many people would like to be in your shoes just like how you wanna be in other people's shoes. Always be contented with what you have. Appreciate every single little things ppl do for you. Because someday.. when all of it vanishes.. you are going to miss it. What matters is that you appreciate what you have now.. so in future, you'd learn to do those little things for ppl you love.
Things can be in small gestures.. but one by one.. small gestures accumulated can mean alot. Your bf doesn't have to give you flowers everyday. But just a simple msg or a call is sufficient. Or simply just smile when you know you have a bad day..
people..
appreciate.
that's what i learnt from my experience.
You can always say.. "How i wish i can go back to the past to those happy memories.."
But at the end of the day, if you'd cherish and appreciate that very happy moment.. you'd continue on by saying..
"But at least e enjoyed myself and i'd no regrets"
Things always happen in a weird way.. Just like.. there's two sides of people.
There's always the good and bad side.
I'd always say..
一个人有多大的缺点，就有多大的优点。
Up till now, i still believe in this phrase.
It's the same for everything..
you can be experiencing super unlucky days now..
but at the end..
someone from above would bless you happy days ahead..
"And this marks THE END of the entry."
8:57 AM
8:57 AM
Living a life full of life. That's all about me that you should know.